14
Sep
06

Why Kathy Bates Will Save the World

My better half is watching Misery on Lifetime-Television-For-Women right now, and I just overheard:

He didn’t get out of the COCKADOODIE CAR!

God, I love Kathy Bates. As if blithely bearing her tits in all their overweight, middle-aged glory in About Schmidt wasn’t enough to earn my respect, she also plays one of the best secondary characters on TV in Six Feet Under (as well as directing a few of the episodes).

And, of course, who could forget good old psychopathic Annie Wilkes from Misery?

You! You dirty bird! How could you?

Misery is alive. Misery is alive! Oh, this whole house is going to be full of romance. Oooh, I am going to put on my Liberace records!

At the feedstore do I say, “Oh, now Wally, give me a bag of that F-in’ pig feed, and a pound of that bitchly cow corn”? At the bank do I say, “Oh, Mrs. Malenger, here is one big bastard of a check, now give me some of your Christ-ing money!”

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