… but enough about me

As you may know, I edit a blog for NewsWorks called Speak Easy, where I run essays and commentary from people in the Philly region. I’m on the lookout for new perspectives on same-sex marriage. Would you be interested in writing something? or do you know someone who might be?

Please get in touch with me, and let me know. I’d like to start making some contacts to see what kind of commentaries we can drum up.

With New Jersey, Maryland and Delaware allowing same-sex marriage all around us, we could continue to run arguments in favor of or against gay marriage in Pennsylvania. It seems far more interesting to me, however, since same-sex marriage is a fact in 16 states and D.C., to write about things like how to refer to one’s partner/spouse/husband/wife.

• If you tell a stranger you’re married, does that convey enough information anymore? Do you need to follow it up immediately with a reference to your HUSBAND or WIFE to make it clear that you’re not straight? If you don’t, do you risk inadvertently closeting yourself? or do you feel like it’s not necessary, marriage is marriage, it doesn’t matter what people know, and if they make the wrong assumption you’ll simply correct them? Are you hoping for a chance to correct them?

• Do you find yourself having to answer weird questions you thought you had put behind you years ago, like: “Who’s the Mr. and who’s the Mrs.?” Is the issue of marriage forcing you to come out again in ways you hadn’t expected; and is it re-awakening confusion in your friends, family?

• What are the issues involved for transgender individuals in heterosexual marriages who have transitioned and are now in same-sex marriages?

• What are the under-reported issues that crop up uniquely in minority communities? in relationships between partners of different racial backgrounds?

• Are you having a crisis of faith, butting up against the values of your religious leaders and peers?

• If you got married in Delaware and you live in Pennsylvania, you can file your federal taxes jointly with the IRS, but you must file separately for state tax purposes. Has this created any confusion for you yet?

• Do you find yourself under pressure from friends and family to marry your partner — when, perhaps, regardless of the law, you never had any intention of getting legally married? Now that you have the option, depending on where you live, are you any more likely to get married?

• What other social, legal and linguistic conundrums does same-sex marriage open up while some states recognize it and others do not?

I’m reaching out to folks, in relationships or not, who have either had direct experiences with these issues or who might know someone who has. I’m looking for opinions, thoughtful ruminations, personal perspectives — even hard research if you have it…

If you would like to write something for NewsWorks — or if you know someone you could refer me to — please get back to me as soon as you can.

Thanks much,

Eric